Hi Ho Hi Ho…

After 11 weeks to do as I please (which was hardly anything because of the foot!) this week I got the call to say I was no longer regarded as a health and safety risk and I could go back to work! My first reaction was to yell yippee, then I had a sit down, thought about it and seriously wished it wasn’t happening.

I’d settled into a nice new routine and was enjoying the time to myself and increased time with Georgia and I didn’t like the idea of that changing. In my head I work part time because I have Thursday at home but in reality that’s a 30 hour (usually more) week, in a very busy, often pressured environment. I looked around the house and saw mess and began to panic when I was ever going to have chance to tidy or clean. Don’t get me wrong I refuse to bust a gut trying to keep our home clean and tidy each day because I get so frustrated when its dirty and messy again within hours (Mr L is a plasterer so dust follows him and he is not a tidy person!) but working again would mean I’d have to spend my day off at home armed with a duster and vacuum and not having fun with little miss. Instead of always eating after 9pm, we’ve been able to sit as a family even if little miss barely ate anything we were all together with food in front of us.

There was a list of things I’d wanted to do whilst I was at home. Books I’d not managed to read yet, a jigsaw still in the wrapper. Not to mention the spare ‘bedroom’, piled high with boxes and our old bed propped against the wall. I’d thought about selling my wedding dress but hadn’t gotten any further than thinking about it.

And what about my blog! I was just starting out and needed to be home, reading, writing, sharing. Working on getting new followers and likes on social media. How was I going to fit everything in when I was back at work.

Then I thought about seeing my friends at work and how much I had missed the conversations we had and the burden they may have faced. Although I work closely with other colleagues I am the only person doing the job I do and I take pride in that, I feel a sense of responsibility and didn’t like that my being away would add to anybody else’s already overflowing to do list.

This time last year I was returning to work after 11 months maternity leave and although it was hard leaving little miss in the very capable hands of Grandma and Grandad L, I had looked forward to being Kelly again. Within months of being back I took a promotion and added another couple of hours to the working week. The guilt of being a working mum now hits me in waves. When I had to change my days and put Georgia in nursery 1 morning a week I felt like the worst person in the world. She hated it for the first 2 months and cried throughout her time there and it was all my fault for working Fridays. When I’m late home from work, or when I have to drop her off super early I feel bad for Georgia and her grandparents.

I then look at the person little miss is and although I would love to be a SAHM I also know I’m not that type of mum and I doubt she would have the personality she has and do all the things she does if I was home each day. I don’t (can’t) bake, I’m not particularly artistic either. I took her to every baby and toddler group in our village when I was on maternity but only because Grandma L took Georgia’s cousin too. I didn’t feel comfortable with the cliques and struggled to make conversation with the other mums. She has made friends at nursery and has a fantastic relationship with all her grandparents and her cousins.

So after agreeing to go back on short 5 hour days for the immediate future, I am now determined to better juggle being Kelly/Mummy/Wife, making the most of my time with Georgia, looking after our home and working in 2015 and beyond. So don’t be surprised if you see Mr L armed with the duster or vacuum, or me not listening when he says I’ll have to cut back on the blog he he

 

A Day For All Us Mummys

As 15th March approaches and brings with it my second Mothers Day, I thought I would reflect on the first one last year.

I remember being super annoyed that Mr L had already enjoyed his first Fathers Day way back when Georgia was less than 2 months old and I’d had to wait until she was almost 11 months but I was also super excited. By early February I was already thinking about what we should do to mark the day, I was conscious that we also paid homage to our own fantastic mums and that my mum enjoyed her first Mothers Day as a Grandma too.

After speaking to my mum we decided to spend the morning, weather permitting, going for a walk round Oakwell Hall Country Park. This meant we could take the dog, enjoy an ice cream and get some fresh air before further celebrations in the afternoon. As a special treat since it was ‘my day’ and after asking for 5 months, Mr L finally let me carry Georgia in the baby carrier (he always argued it was too much hassle changing all the straps so it fit me and that as she got bigger he was saving me from back ache). As daft as it sounds I was so proud to have her strapped to me and was determined to make it through the whole morning without proving him right.

In typical ‘Brockman’ style the morning was always going to go downhill literally! Faced with the option of using steps from the hall back to the field area, or a grass slope we chose the slope naturally. With my precious cargo I was very careful to go slowly, with Neil by my side just in case. Mum on the other hand was left to fend for herself and before we knew it there was a thud, and we all turned round to find her sat on the muddy grass in fits of laughter with Buster (the family dog) starring at her. Cue us all bursting out in fits of laughter too.

For the afternoon I wanted to try and get both families together to celebrate so I floated the idea amongst everybody. Before I knew it there was the 3 of us, my parents and sister, Mr L’s parents, his brother, sister-in-law and 3 children and her mum and sister all on board so I booked a table for 15 at a local Italian restaurant. We enjoyed delicious food and had plenty of laughs, in particular about the morning events, which by this time had gone viral around our wider family.

I’ll admit I’ve given less thought to how to mark the day this year. Over the last year theres been lots of special days and I feel very lucky to be a mummy. Having Georgia has made me appreciate my own mummy even more, so I’ll let her choose what we do, as long as it doesn’t involve slopes or mud. Thanks for reading x

 

Stop Thief!

So I’d been looking forward to a family outing to the fair all week, it was going to be the first time Georgia had ever been to one. I was supposed to be taking her with my mum and dad and then at the last minute Mr L finished work on time to join us. We put on our warmest clothes and set off as it started to get dark so little miss could see all the bright lights at their best. All excited I took a family selfie not long after getting there and within 5 minutes the whole night had been ruined. I can only assume somebody saw me take the picture and put my phone away in my pocket, so when I went to take another picture of Georgia and Daddy minutes later as they sat patiently on the first ride she’s ever been on I went into panic mode when I realised my phone had gone!

I’d been stood by myself watching while my mum and dad bought donuts at a nearby stall, balancing on my crutches and taking in the smiles and different faces coming from Georgia as she took everything in. We frantically searched every pocket twice, my bag 3 times, everyone else’s pockets and bags (despite me knowing it wouldn’t be there), dad set off to do a quick retrace of our steps, whilst mum rang the phone only to find it going straight to voicemail and obviously turned off. Once Mr L came off the ride he said he had seen a woman pass me and at first had thought we must have spoken due to how close she had been but I had no idea she had ever been next to me, or felt anybody close. Tears followed, not for the phone but the photos of Georgia I’ve now lost and whilst dad and I went to a quieter corner to make the necessary calls to the phone company and police we made the decision for mum and Mr L to continue to take Georgia round and try enjoy the outing.

I’ve kicked myself since for not being more vigilant, Mr L has kicked himself for not being by my side and I’ve kicked myself for not keeping a more regular backup of all the data on the phone since changing the laptop last November. Syncing the phone to the new laptop has been on my to do list since then and I’ve no excuse really with the time away from work I’m having. Typically last night after changing about a million passwords just in case, I spent hours reading about apps that can help find your phone even when switched off, about how people can still access info from your phone despite having a pin and ways they can still use/sell your phone despite the handset being blacklisted. I also now know for 79p a month I could have increased the cloud storage I have and had all my photos saved automatically. More kicking myself followed!

The only saving grace is I did have insurance despite there being a £100 excess!!! I’m now waiting for the relevant paper work to arrive and fingers crossed a new phone will follow asap. I can then look forward to the hours it will take to set it up so it at least resembles my old phone, take every security measure that I now know is available and will no doubt be having to change quite a few passwords again having forgotten the new ones already! Thanks for reading x

Linkys: Mummy Monday

Our Christmas and the broken foot!

I realise its February but…I’ve mentioned I fractured my foot on Boxing Day but that was the cherry on top for the Christmas we had! Typically the first Christmas we had decided to host at home!

Georgia hadn’t been well for weeks…she’d had countless sickness bugs, colds and coughs to the point she was being sick again, an ear infection and our Doctor just told us it was all normal and to ride it out. Then Christmas week she came out in spots! Back we went to the doctors on Christmas Eve only to be told the doctor couldn’t be sure and their guess was impetigo or hand, foot and mouth (not to be confused with foot and mouth). Armed with a bottle of penicillin and having been warned she could be contagious we set about cancelling the family visits planned for that day and told her grandparents we understood if they wanted to spend Christmas Day elsewhere. Not wanting to ruin the day they all decided to risk it and despite the penicillin really really not agreeing with little miss we did have a great day!

Mr L had agreed to do a couple of hours behind the bar of our cricket club Boxing Day afternoon, and as my family congregate there after the rugby and because the spots had gone down me and little miss decided to risk a hour out…big mistake. After 30 minutes of being there Georgia started being sick so after a quick clean up and a change of clothes we went home where she instantly fell asleep.

Now the cherry bit…when little miss woke up 3 hours later she was in a great mood, was asking for some toast and insisted on me carrying her and going downstairs. We were doing so well until I reached 3 steps from the bottom and I can’t explain what happened other than we fell. As expected my only thoughts were not dropping Georgia and making sure she landed on me. I obviously acted as a good cushion because she was fine other than in shock.

Poor Neil heard a bang from the kitchen and rushed in to find Georgia crying, me writhing in agony and us both on the floor at the bottom of the stairs. No sooner had he calmed her down I started crying and that set her off again. I assumed it was a sprain so spent the night with it elevated and applied ice but woke up the next day to Mr L adament we were going to the minor injury clinic to be sure and after being told off for not taking any pain relief they confirmed a break, potted me up and sent me away with instructions to phone the hospital on Monday. Merry Christmas!!!